~~ the little love and the big Love ~~

I am the ever present Love
and as the ever present Love
I want the little love
a little love

to meet, to greet
in the woodlands or the street
yea through time in all now moments
I just want a little love

the me, the you
the two or the three so splendid you see
how yin and yang can both split into two
or not one, not two

the little love is huge
the biggest thing we can know
in the oft worshiped mind
so the purpose of mind is to want

just a little love

my ever present Big Love
encompasses my beautiful spark
of all the seeking for her and her
a little love, a little love

so my ever present Big Love
cannot be sullied by duality's game
and even my ever present Big Love
can Love in its Big Love
a little love

a little love

~~ Until You Come ~~

I don't care to be connected
or be a solitary
I don't mind to be included
or left alone just to be
I just want something to move me

I sit around looking lazy
performing a yoga only I see
wondering if it will turn out
that in the end I will be free
I swore an oath on bended knee

the entity towered over me
and I was bowing without any degree
of submission or acceptance
or with any sight to see
and yet still he commanded me

I can't escape, embrace, or deviate
stronger so when I attempt to flee
is the path that I keep walking
a free form destiny
Lord, please just keep me free

I will go anywhere, deny anything
embrace all ways or reject all pleas
just to, just to, just to, just to be
neither neither and infinite singular between
when will you take me more, God?

When I know that they're thinking
its time for me to act
when will you take me God?
these hands, this body, shall not endure
until it endures your constant embrace

the things I could do, create, and win
for the world, and for love, and grace within
I sacrifice all that could be
until you come
come and take me ....

~~ Perversion of Perfection As IS ~~

I Fly
I Soar
I Turn and Twist
wait for the Remix

Gonna Get That Dream
the misty high stream
of the longing mean
between hearts cracking open

the face, the smile
burrows inside a mile
and more within the trial
of missing, missing you

I Run
I Speed
I Flip and Tumble
generate a rumble

The Touch that I held back
is the seed inside my pack
a burden lacking any slack
but growing stronger everyday

Win or Lose, I don't care
Illusion's just the fare
I pay to lay it bare
my heart manifest

I Shine
I Transmit
I Play it Divine
knowing you catch the signs

Transformation is my simple Game
Change as a Constant on this dualistic Plane
of Perfection as Perversion of Perfection As IS
My Soul has got so much to show, for you to know

In the end I will keep silence
play it passive just the way that makes you crazy
over time and a little pressure
turning coal into hard perfection
as Perversion of Perfection As IS

Standards of Conduct in Spiritual Illusions

I often find much contempt within myself at the way in which so called spiritual folk believe, clearly in their minds, that they have possession of a right way. Concealed within an ideal, usually nowadays ascribed to ones capacity for hedonistic liberation ... it is to me laughable.

I support the right to life, and the right to find pleasure in ones life in whatever way one sees fit ... it is the judgmental result in the minds of some practitioners that I cannot abide by. For they do not practice, they seek only satisfaction in the end. Seeking true freedom and an end to bondage is also a seeking and therefore small compared to a wide catholic and integral way.

What sorts of morals could ever be communicated through some sort of rule being expressed in the mind, in the speech, in the conduct. Each moment, the life presents to us a possibility for infinite acceptance, for infinite freedom ... these things are not to be found in the astral/mental, or even higher subtle, causal, and gnostic planes.

I often wonder how much time and energy is wasted, in these days when efficiency is by all means relatively all important; in thoughts about the way; the right way; the only way. Holding judgment within the mind unexpressed does nothing to change what it does to the energy field. The morphogenetic result is the same whether it is expressed in the speech, in the action, in the emotions, or held back within the recesses of even an illumined mind.

When will we accept that even an illumined mind is still mind, and hence, not enough? Tears I will shed, and pain I will endure ... indeed will I do anything for love; but I won't do that.

Pilgrimage to the Temples of Damanhur

I planned on going to the Temples in Italy to not only get out of New York City, but to simply take advantage of a Sacred Space in which to do my own Spiritual Work. What I inevitably found in Damanhur was much more than I could have possibly imagined.

Of all the things I saw, experienced, and learned, what was most profound is the practical and thoroughly Magickal nature of the whole of the Damanhurian community. Am I still over the whole 'Guru gains followers and expands base of power in attempt to save/rule the world?' ... yes of course I am still over this. But while the founder Falco seems to have mixed feelings about his experiment in practical Alchemy growing into such large proportions, there is something deeper in the Damanhurian community which prevented me from reaching for a loaded wand.

In a few words, it's quite real. The Temples themselves are an ultimate Testament to this. They evoke memories of a distant past lived in other ego's ... and I don't even believe we bring ego with us as we transmigrate. But somehow, these temples pull out the experiences of my soul in past wanderings through the Earth plane. These things I rarely admit to being anything other than agnostic about, simply because the principles and applications in the Magickal community usually amount to nothing more than narcissistic fantasia. But again, maybe it was just the kool-aid; but there is something very real and very practical going on in Damanhur.

The key to realization is not in thinking it, but knowing it as something just as real as getting hit directly in the face. An example of this happening in Damanhur was not the beauty of the Temples, but in the practitioners they sent to guide us through the experience. I was most thoroughly impressed on a Magickal level by one Ornitorinco. I attended a lecture on Esoteric Physics expecting to be underwhelmed by some 'secret-esqu' pseudo philosophy. However, during the lecture; while most of my mind was completely engaged in learning from and absorbing Ornitorinco's vast intellect, the rest of it was exclaiming "Holy Shit, that's a Real Alchemist!". I freely admit it could have been his seriously sexy Italian accent ... but really it was like getting hit in the face, a real realization. In Damanhur, the shit is real. As Ornitorinco said "the universe may be an illusion, but it works!"

There is much else to be experienced in Damamnhur, such as an amazing education about self-sufficient permaculture and running a successful energy efficient eco-community. You can even learn about Art, and especially Alchemical Artistic expression. But for Magicians, the core of the community is in exploration of the Esoteric Field of research. And this means experimentation in various internal and external Alchemical Laboratories. It means a new breed of talismanic technology called 'Selfica' (not to be confused with the english word 'Self'). It also means a philosophy which is magickal, perennial, and philosophic to the core. This is not only expressed through lectures, but the temples themselves act as massive reservoirs of the True Knowledge. Anyone who has even the slightest grasp of Occult Philosophy will be completely and utterly blown open by the depth of knowledge preserved in the Art of the Temple Walls. I cannot express enough the purity of the philosophical base from which Damanhur operates. Right down to a Thelemic like emphasis on individuality, and even individuality as separate communal identities within the overall federation.

Damanhur, its philosophy, its citizens, are not a cult. They are a powerful new culture made up of people balancing a thoroughly eco-feminine sustainability and connection to Nature and Natural forces, with an amazingly masculine approach to philosophy, scientific inquiry into the field of esotericism, and the directionality to achieve the miraculous with ones own hands; in the practical realm. Fully grounded on earth, with their hearts open and minds reaching beyond the stars. As one of my companions said during the visit: "they really go through the whole spectrum here, from cleaning the toilet to talking to Aliens!" Indeed.

~~ Gods in the Process ~~

Materialized in duality
with an intuition of infinity
We struggle to stay immortal
with the promise of death ahead

Through suffering and crisis
of heart and mind
Do we realize the reality
of loves transformation

We Became Gods in The Process
Of living a dream
We Became Gods in The Process
Lucidity bears in this truth

Polarized bodies
attraction to the little death
Fickle or deep we offer
our seed in a puddle of bliss

Through disappointment
and illusion of destiny
do we fake the fantasy
of separation and soul

We Became Gods in The Process
Of living a dream
We Became Gods in The Process
Lucidity bears in this truth

Spiraling onward and upward
into the light of the thou art God
Matter to space to energy to time
Our perception turns to light

~~ Black Cat ~~

Down that open road, I go, I go
to some forward thinking mode
a feeling inside the chest, the heart
cradled by my living breath

A scent among the breeze
autumn comes at a distant speed
I turned back to look for you
but once again I've already gone

If it wasn't for this depth
a sense of anchor, purpose, and yet
a sadist view of self importance
a notion that I am

Maybe I would stay, perhaps
or maybe I would dance away
as I always seem to do
when I wish to stay awhile with you

Destiny meets with free will's call
I made the choice, I've made them all
it's a crucifix to be like me
sadly, its exactly how I like to be

I'm not good for anyone, anyway
because good is a sad comfort
boring, normal, a thousand faces sleeping
you can take whats good and shove it

My delight is in transcendence
so for now, ta ta
I have to go adventuring, learning
so when I cross your path again

you'll recognize a black cat when you see it

~~ Alterations ~~

Alterations at Anywhere by Aoiveae Luiahe

Upon an unchanged wind
does a fluttering dream transpire
to cast its altered glance
upon the seed of a desire

All is twisted and remarked
turned into spirals moving upward
and in the stream of programmed thoughts
a spark is swimming faster forward

these results which we entail
of alterations on the subtle spheres
reaching through the involution
evolution turns to tears

the greatest act is acting not
in simple moments spontaneity
do we confess the simple way
of compressed trans-duality

a phasing of the being
alters the instinctual ayre
and all are acting hence within
observing plays of differing pairs

who knows how such the unchanged wind
is in its nature that of change itself
for meaning is in love with memory
and truth is something called no-self

and what was before is turned to not
altering visions of all future's past
and in its place a vacuum abyss
by character impossible to last

Free Will has had its way with you
and its not that knot that is gonna choose
the wind remains unchanged
twas just the ego being altered

New Enochian Images

I've been re-envisioning the Enochian Image Archive. This first collection was a major success and will still be available for a limited time at:

Enochian Image Archive

For now, here is a preview of the new set:

0. Corpus Omnium



1. The Praising Watchtower of Energy



2. The Ministering Watchtower of Time



3. The Establishing Watchtower of Matter



4. The Confounding Watchtower of Space



The Great Table of Terra



The 93 Parts of the Earth



The Thirty (1) Ayres



Stare Long and Often!

The Tenth Key

The Ninth Key

The Eighth Key

The Seventh Key

The Sixth Key

The Fifth Key

The Fourth Key

Letting Go into Babalon

Calling out to Babalon, all my riches poured into her cup of abominations. Abomination is all the ego, will to power, emotion and thoughts that I take for my freedom. Simply, they are perforce already sacrificed and my choice is to simply accept that she is Nature, and a blind mechanical force.

Equality and Oneness are the keys to all practice. Equality is a superpower of sorts, whereby all happenings and occurrence whether they be harboring joy or sorrow, are met with an unequaled and unshakable peace, bliss, and divine delight.

This requires a deep consecration to the work. Because simply being apathetic, or stoic, or some other sleight of mind is not the key to her, to Babalon. We must go beyond all these things, especially when the smaller nature is moving out of control and acting within the bondage of Nature.

Equality leads to a perception of oneness. That everything without is contained within, and Truth Power and real Liberation is transcendent to that thing we call a self, and will never be possessed. To worship Babalon is to let go. To let go is to give up desire for the fruits of our labor, and to first give all acts and works to the divine.

This is the meaning of the blaspheme that states All the Blood of the Saints and of all The Martyrs of Jesus are poured into the cup of Babalon. Because as a whore amongst whores, she accepts all with pleasure and delight, and denies nothing. How could she? She is supported by a Power that goes even beyond her, and she is bound by her whoredom to do this work; and we are bound to her.

Oh Babalon, will you accept all my lower nature that you already possess? It is in this self-giving that we learn to dance with her. Cutting the root of our bondage, we can become free. And eventually, if we are lucky and the consecration made perfect, we shall indeed realize the liberation beyond. True freedom of delight in Life that is not bound to Heart or Mind.

Always there is a secret center, the heart girt by a serpent that is asking us to move beyond. For the things that occur in life are there because of our specific nature, some unique play that serves our growth into a true expression of the Divine Law in the here and now.

Babalon is here, and she is going to have you; but you will never have her. The only thing in this laborious process of Eternity manifesting in Time is to Let Go.

And so we shall.

156, Scarlet Seven Upon Sevens, oh Babalon she is! Sweet and Calculating Babalon. My life is yours and poured into your cup. All that can occur does not serve but as a way for you to live me. It is not what I feel, but what you feel through me .... because Truth and the Life Divine are beyond all this inconscient and reproachable ego. Babalon, Babalon, I say BABALON!

The Third Key

The Second Key

~~ Consternation ~~

(a message from the Thrice Crowned Angel Carmara to 73)

How can I endure an illusion
when it's all become so real?
See, all this inspiration
carries with it much appeal.

I'm a child once again,
immaturity liberated
takes all the growth of the world
and infuses all that's been created.

This time, I told myself
I'll just handle it with ease
'cause everyone looks and notices
how my heart seems so diseased.

But it bleeds, oh it bleeds;
inexplicably it just bleeds
into puddles of fantasia
wrapped in all the things you need.

It's so black that it's the light
of which what we see is just the cloth,
and I am struggling with the notion
that all is not yet lost.

It's that flash of inspiration,
the sweet way that things could be;
it could all come in a moment
if you would just let your body see.

Are you really so in slumber
to the natural course of life
that letting go of consternation
is like plunging in the knife?

I know its fucking crazy
to be so open and so free;
but damn! the world is ending
so please come away with me.

I have so much to tell you;
the things your soul cries out to know.
I'm asking all the worlds and everything,
if only you'd let go.

It's out of left field
and upsets the whole world view.
Never again will it be easy, yet;
it's all been done for you.

Some movement brought us here
and it's bigger than the stars;
writ across the kosmic spate,
manifesting as deep scars.

This unreality is so real ...

The First Key

Come one and all to Retrograde

The occult significance of the Mercurial force is meta-normal in Nature. Some may refer to this as 'Spiritual', or perhaps as taking account of opportunities for metaphysical healing (or wishful thinking). But generally and alchemically (as in psychologically, for we would do a great dishonor if we attempt to attribute objective truth to that which is wholly subjective and inter-subjective) Mercury is something we take advantage of in salesmanship, trickery, quick thinking and the like.

But the inner Mercurial force is the divine architect which is also Death, the destroyer and creator of worlds and the master of change. Look at The Death card in the Tarot and you find Scorpio, a world contained within the fear inside your kidneys and all its power in the LETTING GO.


The symbol for Mercury and the Medical Profession is the Caduceus. While the Magically inclined among you may be very aware of all I am saying, a magickal blog should hardly ever pander to Magicians; for we should know all there is to know about each others art already.(intellectual battle over semantics notwithstanding)

This Caduceus is the supreme secret contained within the Tantra. That deep inside your biological core, your gut, where your sex and your serotonin make life worth suffering, the alchemical furnace burns hot, and this secret center coiled around the molten core must be activated so the energy can be felt coursing up your spine. Writhing and moving like the twin snakes of the Caduceus.



You can do this with your mind over time, or you can jack your energy with sex like taking drugs. It hardly matters and don't let panzy spiritual types tell you otherwise. During retrograde, this is the moment par excellence for this to occur whether by force of will or by force of cock and cunt.

While others become deeply confused in an attempt to avert total communication breakdown, the true Magician is cumming out the top of his head (really cumming out of the 7th chakra point between the tips of the ears). This can appear quite awkward to the socially obsessed. But society is downright hysterical that way; when you are the one living in sweet and divine foolish hysteria.

Magick is TIMING, and timing is biology. It's not very rational because it is in fact pre-rational. The Magickal/Biological Timing is a component to rational thinking. So that the Tantrika with his union of all manner of opposites approaches the dissolution of emptiness and form in the 'neither-neither'; not two and not one. That is the retrograde moment. The simultaneous destroyer and creator of worlds. Beyond the petty and egoic desire, beyond the small will to power, beyond even the gushing and seething of a deeply emotional heart.

Into the light of Pure Will through suffering and the realization that THOU ART GOD and that THERE IS NO GOD. Divinity shines through in a purely godless universe, and this is the ancient secret of Mercury, the Magician, The Tantrika, and the Enlightened.

~~ Knowing what you Don't ~~

You didn't know, You didn't know
the way it all would go.
Superficial to the way
you didn't know what you knew.

Turn Away, Turn Away
like the Arc you'll melt away.
The world too, shall fall away
then you'll know, oh you'll know.

You look into the eyes
of who you knew, when you knew;
and shrink just like a child
'cause your soul, it always knows.

The sameness is the cause
of shrinking flowers that give pause;
to that one moment of a choice
that changes all the laws

you thought you knew, you thought you knew